What must he be thinking??

Danny decided he wanted to do a "guest blog" after our mishaps in the car yesterday. I will apologize early for any offensive language he uses!!

Yesterday we were making our way back from a quick weekend in Beijing when all sorts of madness happened in the car. First, we had to use our mini potty within the first 20 minutes for Coop to go. Thus, one bag of urine was sitting in the front of the van early on! And then, this scene occurred about an hour from Tianjin...Danny and I couldn't stop laughing while we discussed what our driver must be thinking!!


Inside Lao Tang's Head (our driver)


Ethan: “Mom.... I think I’m going to throw up”...

Kimmie: “Ahhhh! Danny!!!”

Lao Tang: Pondering: (Hmmm... what are these disgusting foreigners doing? The little one seems to make the noise from the mouth... sounds of the horses from the Yangtze River delta...)

Danny: “Oh crap!!”

Ethan: “Uggghhhh.... It’s coming....I’m going to throw up!!!!”

Danny: “Kimmie! Get me a bag!! Hurry!!!”

Kimmie: “I’m trying!!!! Ahhhh!!! Here it is!!!!! (gives an inside out bag to Danny)

Lao Tang: thinking to self: (The foreign boy makes the Yangtze war cry again... Perhaps he speaks to the ancient Budda’s spirit from this disgusting noise? What could this be??!)

Ethan: “Blaaaaaarrrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh Bluuuuuhhhhhhh !!!!!” (Barfing violently)

Danny: “In the baaaaaag!!”
Kimmie: “Ahhhhhh!!! I’m going to be sick!!! Uhhhhhhhgggg!”

Lao Tang: thinking to self: (The little Dragon child spews the venom of the foreigners from America... By the Temple of Heaven - the smell.... oh Lord, the smell....!!)

Danny: “It’s all over the place! Wipe it from his nose!!! Ahhh!”

Ethan: “Blaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!”.... (Yup... it’s still coming out...)

Kimmie: I can’t do it!!! I’m going to throw up now too!!!!” Ahhhhhhh!!!

Lao Tang: thinking: (The foreign woman too?... she too makes the horrible noises... Do all foreigners do this? Is this normal for these putrid foreign species?? I will attempt to pretend that I can not hear this ruckus....)

Ethan: “Gllllllluuuuuuuhhhhhhh, Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!”

Lao Tang: thinking: (Can not take it much more... can’t pretend... oh - the smell... the foreign Emperor’s child spews again...!)

Danny: “ok - I think he’s done... What do I do with the bag??!!”

Kimmie: “I can’t look!!!! I’m going to be sick!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!”

Danny: to self: “this is what my life has come to?... Try to stay calm... geez - this is kinda funny, though.... My God - I wonder what Lao Tang is thinking??!!”

Danny: To Lao Tang: “Hao bu hao”? (everything ok?)

Lao Tang: To the St. Martin foreigners in Chinese: “You sick bastards.”

And so, we made it back to Tianjin with three bags of bodily excretions in the van...our poor driver!!